Glass Table Tops

I saw this beautiful picture of this glass table earlier today – and thought Wow!

How amazing, and refined and… then I started thinking about it.

Legs!

No, not table legs. Far, far worse than that.

My legs!

OK, Ladies – I’m sure that you will understand…

You really expect me to walk in these… For the love of all things, what are you thinking???

When I stand, with the right heels on my shoe – and holding my posture to the best of my willpower – my legs, and especially my thighs, can look rather graceful if not even a little bit gorgeous. Looks of envy (???) follow me as I strut about in my ankle-breaking heels (surely these have to be designed by a man. No woman in her right mind would inflict such stupidity and danger on their fellow species… surely???)

Anyways, I digress..

Standing and tottering, I mean walking, my legs can look a bit va-va-voom! But this all comes to an abrupt halt when I sit down.

With gravity no longer working for me, my thighs splurg out across the chair seat, stretching the confines of my pant legs or skirt. It reminds me of bread-dough being kneaded by the baker – kind of flabby and flopping all over the place. Squished, splattered, ugly, lumpy and un-controlled.

Yep – my thighs become something like two giant uncooked loaves,  squished across the chair seat and beginning to pour off the edges in dollops, free to escape the confines of my clothing and looking, well, a little less sexy and a little more blobby.

Back to the Glass Table Top

The last thing on my list of things I want to do is to sit at a table with 6 to 8 friends with my fat, lolloping thighs on show for all to see through the glass table top. Think hippopotamus on steroids…

Add to that the fact that I might look serene and lady-like from the waist up, but my legs go into manly splayed and crossed when I sit down. (Sorry Mother, that was a complete waste of etiquette lessons if ever there was!)

So, my point is, to designers especially…

The LAST THING a lady wants when sitting to eat a meal is for her legs, thighs, etc to be on full show for all to see.

There’s a reason why glass table tops tend to be rippled, textured, opaque. It keeps a ladies modesty…

Don’t think I’m being sexist here – I haven’t even started on the graces of a man’s lower regions when eating… ungainly, unsightly and… Enough already!

After all that, if you still want a glass topped outdoor dining table, then why not take a peak at this design – an extract from my top ten review of outdoor dining tables (for full article – click here)

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7-Piece Black Rattan Dining Table and Chair Set

Simply sophistication and bucket-loads of style combine in this elegant Rattan dining set. This set provides a perfect balance between dining seating and laid-back comfort. Because, sometimes, when we eat outside it’s more about having a relaxing time shared with friends than the formality of the dining.

This is a lovely set of 6 black PE Rattan arm-chairs with a glass topped, rectangular, PE rattan table. The design is very modern and simplistic with long, straight or gently sweeping lines. The dining set comes fitted with tailor made seat cushions.

The rectangular table is 59” by 31.5” in size. It has straight legs in each corner connected to a rattan frame which supports the table top. All the rattan is woven around a powder coated steel frame for strength. The table top is made of clear glass. There is no hole for an umbrella.

This outdoor dining set has 6 steel-framed, black rattan arm-chairs. Each chair has a stream-lined design, with the rattan sides stretching down to the base of the chair legs. The cushions are tailor-made to fit the chairs and are fully UV resistant and fade-proof.

This patio table and chair set is fully weather resistant, being constructed from resin rattan, glass and treated steel frame. All the legs of the chairs and table have rubber stands to prevent damage to your paved outdoor surface. The chairs all push fully beneath the table when not in use.

The set requires some construction and this can be easily done by two-people.

If you are looking for a modern stylish and non-fussy dining set, that is functional and low maintenance then this is a suitable dining table and chairs set.

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And, of course, the final problem of a see-through table surface is self-explanatory if anyone has watched ‘When Harry met Sally’… wink wink!

I’m now off to practice walking in my platform shoes. The 70’s have nothing on me. Oh yeah baby.

Bye for now

Alison

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